Lazy Sunday. Also Rains and Snows

This is how I spent my Sunday.

Can’t believe I spent my Sunday doing nothing but lie on bed and alternate between napping, watching Breaking Bad and irritating Shraddha. And also, occasionally, peeking out of the balcony window inhaling the humidy breeze which has the aroma of rain drops falling on a dry earth.

I have always had such Sunday every rainy season I care to remember. Even while I was in US, I looked forward to such a day during the nut numbing snows of dearly city of Cincinnati. There is huge contrast, though, between the rains of Bombay city and the snows of Cincinnati.

Rains in a way offer some kind of optimism. The time after a small shower of rains turns the mood around and makes you feel little better than no rains and the scorching heat of the sun. It sure feels annoying when it rains at the wrong time or when it spoils your clothes or it is a torrential downpour. Yet it has a capacity to make you feel better when it falls for the right time and in right quantity.

If you happen to live near hills, then there is no denying how the whole place turns to greenlandish paradise.

But the same, in my humble opinion, doesn’t apply for snow. For me snow always brings the emotion of sadness. I did feel unusually good when I first experienced snow falling over my three layered clothed body. It did feel good to catch the snow flake fall right over my pinkish tongue. But all of this was temporary. I never, ever, felt the same again even a year later when the winter cycled through again. The first days of rainy season ain’t quite same as the first days of snows for me.

Only one good thing about snow.

The laziness that I am talking about came naturally during snows. The main reason being, I just hated going out. It is just too damn cold to do anything except drink beer or occasionally use the snow to cool the beer faster than your freezer could.

Snow looks goddamn beautiful on TV or a picture when you are sitting comfortable in your living room in a temperate zone.  But experiencing it, for like 3 months straight, you will do anything, I mean anything, to get out of there. The best example is the movie Fargo by Coen brothers. Almost every scene that is filmed out side of the house has snow. Every frame. Yet, you will love it. You will be mesmerized by the beautiful scenery which the film captures amazingly well. You will want to be there in such a paradise.

You see that white shit at the bottom half of the pic? No, it’s not heaven. It’s goddamn snow. Everywhere.

But it’s all lies. White Lies I tell ya.

You can’t do shit in such a city except drink hot coffee whole day or take a hot shower. You will do everything that is opposite of cold. Driving is the bitchiest of all.

Pretty much the reality.

So yeah, you can imagine, why I said snow brings the emotion of sadness. Rains, on the other hand, brings me the image of color green which signifies growth and optimism. And soaked bodies of certain feminine species.

Also, the feeling of being lazy – like really lazy – like i-have-lots-of-stuff-that-i-can-do-but-i-dont-wanna-do. Snow, on the other hand gives you this kind of laziness – i-have-lots-of-stuff-i-want-to-do-but-i-cant-do-shit-because-of-the-incessant-white-stuff-which-is-totally-not-as-cool-as-they-showed-in-the-movies.

Meanwhile in Russia.


Short Skirt & Long Jacket

So, for like 10 months I was living without a cable service at my home. No, no, I am not a psycho, anti-social, alienated recluse (apparently this is what I get to hear when I tell my friends ¯\(°_o)/¯ )

Last year when I came back home from US, I moved out with my mom (oh, the irony). There were plenty of things that had to be changed. One of them was to get the cable service or not. I didn’t care. But my mom did. Mom said no. I was like – Okay. She was like, hmmmm.

Actually, I did ask her why? Why on earth would you not want to see all those garbage dramatic serials that you loved watching couple of years ago? Why would you say no to those brainwashing & family-feuding drama? Why no now?

Actually, actually I didn’t get that dramatic. But, anyways,  her answer was – “I am getting old”.

My reaction was this

And she also said that both of us are anyways out working throughout the day and so it doesn’t make any sense paying for something that we won’t use it often. Those words – Tyler Durden would have been proud of my mom.

“Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don’t need.” – Tyler Durden, ~Fight Club

This is what she told everyone after that. This is what I said to all of my friends after that.

As days went by, we did, however, find a common interest due to lack to cable – movies. My passion for movies comes from my father’s passion for cinema. My mom, too, loved movies as far as I can remember going way, way back in time. My mom was a Bollywood movie fan whilst my father was a Hollywood movie fan. We had a color television and a VCR long before anyone else had in my neighborhood.

So, we started seeing movies on our Sony Bravia 32″ LCD. And we saw a lot together. Mostly around dinner time. I had no  problem in choosing movies from my 2TB collection (yes!). I collected all of these when I was in US using my 20Mbps internet connection! Oh, good ol’ days. I miss my 20Mbps of awesomeness.

I might write about some of the movies later. Without even asking, I know what genre my mom likes – science fiction & war action! She can watch a horror movie #likeaboss. Me? Well this  image.

Confess, you do it too.

I am sure you must be thinking what the heck all of this has to do with the title of this post and the video on top?!

Well, it just happens that the inspiration for this post (here comes another irony) is the advertisement I saw on my Tata Sky today. Yes, I did finally get the DTH cable from TataSky on Mother’s Day!

I know

Actually, it was my decision to get TataSky. I had to get it. For movies, you know. Also for occasional sports watching. And Comedy Central. Big Bang Theory. Archer. Daily Show with John Stewart. South Park. Seinfeld. Mad Men.

Frankly, I didn’t knew all of these shows were being aired in India. I was addicted to these while I was in US.

There is a reason why I got it on Mother’s Day. No matter how many times my mom has denied the need to have a cable service, I knew if she already had it, she wouldn’t mind watching some of the channels. It will keep her occupied when she has nothing to do at home. She, however, still, doesn’t want to watch any of the drama series which is absolutely fine with me.

So, now to the video – today I was watching Archer on Comedy Central and came across this advertisement from Fasttrack. The first time I saw the ad was a while ago, but when I heard it I immediately knew the song. It is from one of my favorite indie alternative rock band – Cake.

This seems to be an exaggerated lyrical song that is simply about finding the right girl – a girl who has a sense of opposition or contrast in her styles. It is about how men look for a particular women with certain details about them. Sometimes these details can be as specific as having a short skirt and a long jacket.

Cake, however, is pretty infamous for the double meanings of their songs. While I do exaggerate the possible double meaning, I do think that Cake is trying to be somewhat ironic with the short skirt/long jacket metaphor. What the short skirt/long jacket combination is truly representative of is the dual standard the male-dominated society has set up for women – the demand to be sexy and moral at the same time.

Well, one can also argue, that there is nothing wrong in expecting a girl to be progressive (short skirt metaphor) while at the same time be traditional (long jacket metaphor). This is especially, in my opinion, applicable to Indian women.

There is still plenty of good things in our traditions – family values, festivities, local food (versus junk food), etc. But one cannot turn blind to the ugliness of it too – amongst many being sexism and domestication of women.

Striking a balance between the two – being progressive and traditional – would be ideal and completely acceptable. I have hardly come across any girl that aspires to be a housewife these days. Most of them want to have as much independence in choosing a career and life as men generally have.

Here’s the lyrics:

I want a girl with the right allocations
Who’s fast and thorough
And sharp as a tack
She’s playing with her jewelry
She’s putting up her hair
She’s touring the facility
And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnng jacket……

I want a girl who gets up early
I want a girl who stays up late
I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity
Who used a machette to cut through red tape
With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass

Well, anyways, I just wanted to share this song, which was actually the main reason for this post.

Oh, BTW, here’s a tongue-in-cheek sexist wisdom of the century.

Zombie Apocalypse

Unless you are a caveman or an alien, you know when you ask a little kid to stay in a graveyard, even if you arm the kid with a flame-thrower, he or she will freak out.  Why is that? Because at the deepest sub-conscious level, all humans know it is just a matter of time until the zombies show up.

If you look at many cultures around the world, there is always – always – some mention about the undead walking the earth. Be it religions or comic books. Yet, in a sane world zombie apocalypse isn’t possible, right?

Right guys?

Well, here we are at an interesting crossroad. Look at this TV news screen grab.

Ladies & Gentlemen, the zombie apocalypse is about to begin. Now I usually don’t believe in any apocalypse that has been predicted by numerous religions and culture and anything to do with sins and what not.

But I do, seriously, believe and secretly wish for a zombie apocalypse. If humans have to go extinct, for all the reasons valid, I wish we go down in a zombie apocalypse.

I think the first time ever I heard about the word zombie was through the epic cult movie – The Night of the Living Dead. But I never felt any special fascination towards the undead. I still remember some moments from my school days where me and my buddies were talking about the movie. It is just flashes of memories.

I think I really fell in love with this genre after I watched “Shaun of the Dead”. The reason for that is because the protagonist in the film is just an average guy living a simple life and have the usual problems of life – broke up with girlfriend, shitty job, parental issues, etc. You instantly connect with the character and feel it is you.

The day he decides to change things around him, is the day the dead suddenly become undead. So now, not only he has to deal with the usual everyday problems of life, he now also have to deal with zombies! The whole city is overrun by mindless, slow-walking, flesh-hungry zombies and the protagonist now has to rise up from his couch and save his mother, his ex, his buddy and, of course,  himself.

I see myself in his shoes whenever I think of zombies. The struggle, decisions and its consequences, I see making them as “Shaun” does in the film. And I so hope it becomes a reality (which, my dear fellow humanoids, is becoming one).

Well, if you want to learn how to survive in a zombie apocalypse, I suggest you start looking at this site.

Here’s a list of movies that feature apocalyptic or post-apocalyptic zombies –


Comfortable Silence

Does anyone remember this scene from Pulp Fiction?

It goes something like this:

Mia: Don’t you hate that?

Vincent: What?

Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it’s necessary to yak about bulls*it in order to be comfortable?

Vincent: I don’t know. That’s a good question.

Mia: That’s when you know you’ve found somebody special. When you can just shut up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.

P.S. Isn’t that true?